


please don't say you love me

by ashikiba (cb97)



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M, basically tatsuya has no clue what's going on from when he joins yosen to when he goes to university
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-26
Updated: 2015-10-26
Packaged: 2018-04-28 08:15:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,375
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5085139
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cb97/pseuds/ashikiba
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I think,” Tatsuya says, leaning back into his seat, “I think that they can’t be as good as you say.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	please don't say you love me

**Author's Note:**

> for the prompt hellos & goodbyes

Tatsuya hears about the Generation of Miracles for the first time when he’s on the plane to Japan. He sighs because he _knows_ Taiga will not be okay with this, the guy can’t admit being second to anybody. The man sitting next to Tatsuya on the plane enthuses about these prodigies, and Tatsuya laughs when he refers to them as “skittle-haired.”

 

“I think,” Tatsuya says, leaning back into his seat, “I think that they can’t be as good as you say.”

 

-

 

Tatsuya encounters a Miracle for the first time on his third day at Yosen, when he walks right into two-plus meters of teenage boy on his way into basketball practice. He doesn’t even have time to process this guy’s unnatural height before a woman who he assumes is the coach grabs the purple-haired giant by the collar and drags him back inside.

 

“I said you can sit out, not that you can leave!” Her hands are planted on her hips, her neck craned back to look up at the boy in front of her. She looks exceptionally small next to him, which would normally make Tatsuya laugh, but the gaze of the boy towering over her is fixed on Tatsuya. His laugh catches in his throat, and he feels nervous.

 

-

 

Tatsuya is _angry_. This guy, this so-called Miracle, doesn’t even care. He doesn’t try. He has the natural talent that Tatsuya would kill for, the height and strength and presence. He can touch the rim of the hoop with the smallest of jumps, he can cross the court in an instant, and _he doesn’t even use it._

 

Tatsuya works incredibly hard, that’s one thing he’ll give himself. People start calling him and Murasakibara “Yosen’s Double Ace” within a few practice games, commenting on how his skills almost rival the Miracles’.

 

_Almost._

 

-

 

Tatsuya can’t figure out when he came to his senses about his anger, when he realized he shouldn’t be angry at Murasakibara, but try his best to work alongside him. He can’t tell you when he started calling the other boy Atsushi, or when he became Muro-chin. All he knows is that it happened, and now he always seems to be carrying an extra piece of candy or two in his backpack.

 

He hears someone in the hallway whisper something about how he’s like Atsushi’s mother. It makes him laugh. He’s Atsushi’s friend, his only friend, really. They’ve got each other, which is enough for them.

 

(And somehow, Tatsuya becomes a little more aware of the times when he reminds Atsushi to do his homework, or to go to bed on time.)

 

-

 

“You and I are enemies now. Come at me like you want to kill me.”

 

Taiga listens to him, and Tatsuya almost regrets it.

 

He prided himself on his hard work, but even that wasn’t enough. When they lose to Seirin, his heart aches. When he leaves the gym, all he can hear is Taiga’s voice and the sound of his fist connecting with Atsushi’s face. All of the anger from when he first came to Yosen had resurfaced, all of the jealousy he had felt suddenly coming back to him. He knows he shouldn’t have hit Atsushi, but he doesn’t regret it.

 

He stops outside the door and breathes, waiting for Atsushi.

 

Five minutes later, he walks out. Tatsuya falls into step next to him. They’re quiet, not that Tatsuya would have been able to talk. He reaches into his bag and pulls out a candy bar, he holds it out to Atsushi, who accepts it.

 

(They both make an effort not to let their fingers touch.)

 

-

 

Tatsuya feels himself breaking in two. He and Taiga are on good terms, and it feels incredible to have his brother back.

 

He and Atsushi don’t change their routine, but they barely talk. Tatsuya wonders if it would be better to just stop, stop whatever their friendship is, but he can’t bring himself to do it. All they’ve got is each other. So he keeps carrying around candy, and Atsushi keeps him silent company.

 

-

 

“You know,” Taiga says, after Tatsuya rants about how Atsushi refuses to talk to him, “He had a crush on you, back around the Inter-High.”

 

Tatsuya sighs because _of course_ Atsushi did and _of course_ he didn’t realize and of course it’s too late for them to be anything. He considers talking to Atsushi about it, but when he walks into practice and looks up at the boy, he can’t. He can’t do it when Atsushi isn’t the first year Miracle who hated basketball, not when his hair out of his eyes and he runs up and down the court during practice, not when Tatsuya himself is leaving for university in a few months, not when there’s so much tension between them it’s a wonder they can play together.

He can’t do it, so he calls practice to an early end on the terms of _because I’m captain and I said so_ and brushes past the team on the way out with a goodbye mumbled under his breath.

 

-

They don’t win any major tournament that year, not with Rakuzan running at full power again, so there’s nothing to rejoice about. He already knows what he’s going to do next, there’s an acceptance letter to a university in America waiting on his desk for him.

 

After his last practice, Tatsuya unties his shoes slower than he ever has before and takes his time changing. He’s the first one done.

 

His goodbye to the team is a silent one. He nods at everyone in the locker room, avoiding eye contact. When the door slams shut behind him, he faintly hears Atsushi’s voice. He doesn’t go back inside.

 

-

 

The final boarding call for Tatsuya’s flight rings over the airport intercom. His eyes sweep the terminal waiting area one last time, and he pretends not to be upset when all he can see are Taiga and Alex waving at him.

 

As he pushes his bag up into the carrying compartment, a crumpled up candy wrapper falls out of one of the pockets. Tatsuya doesn’t let himself cry.

 

-

-

-

-

 

It’s snowy and cold and Tatsuya realizes he should have worn gloves. He tucks his freezing hands into his pockets and buries his face a little further down into his scarf.

 

Honestly, he should be used to the snowy Akita weather, but university in America killed his tolerance of the cold. Not that he really minds it. The chill seeping into his bones reminds him of his two years of high school in Japan. It reminds him of the worn out sneakers left in his closet and the unread texts from Taiga waiting on his phone. Text messages that were sent back in May, but he can’t answer them.

 

And the snow, the snow reminds him of cotton candy.

 

The inviting glow from the cafe across the street calls at Tatsuya. He trudges through the snow on the street, and stops at the door because there’s _no way in hell_ he’s taking his glove-less hand out of his pockets.

 

Tatsuya barely finishes his thought when he’s cut off by a large hand reaching for the handle of the door. Tatsuya’s eyes trail up to find the hand is connected to an impossibly long arm which is connected to an impossibly tall person, with a painfully familiar mop of purple hair. Tatsuya feels his heart clench.

 

They stare at each other for a moment and there are so many things running through Tatsuya’s mind. He feels the anger pull his stomach, the sadness knock his chest, the regret prick at his skin. He’s dreamt of this moment but it’s far, _far_ more agonizing that he could have imagined. Atsushi’s eyes are glazed over and Tatsuya can’t pick out a hint of emotion in them.

 

 _Fuck it_ , he decides.

 

“Hello,” he says. He can hear his voice waver.

 

Tatsuya breathes. Atsushi doesn’t say anything.

 

Atsushi pulls the door of the cafe open, and lightly jerks his head, motioning inside. Tatsuya feels his whole body swell with warmth. (It might have been the relief that flooded through him, but he lets himself believe it was from the heat of the cafe rushing out towards them.)

 

They walk inside together.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> thanks to nizhni (@kkaneki) for the help with this fic!!! also check out her tumblr @/josuha


End file.
